How can a student pass?
How Can A Student Pass ?
It's not the fault of the student if he fails, because the year has only 365 days.
A typical academic year for a student.
1) Sundays-52,Sundays in a year, which are rest days.Balance 313 days.
2) Summer holidays-50 where weather is very hot and difficult to study.Balance 263 days.
3) 8 hours daily sleep-means 30 days.Balance 141 days.
4) 1 hour for daily playing-(good for health) means 15 days.Balance 126 days.
5) 2 hours daily for food & other delicacies(chew properly & eat)-means 30days.Balance 96 days.
6) 1 hour for talking (man is a social animal)-means 15 days Balance 81 days.
7) Exam days per year atleast 35 days.Balance 46 days.
8) Quarterly, Half yearly and festival (holidays)-40 days.Balance 6 days.
9) For sickness atleast 3 days.Balance 3 days.
10) Movies and functions atleast 2 days.Balance 1 day.
11) That 1 day is your birthday."How can a student pass?"
Two engines
A large two engine train was crossing America.
After they had gone somedistance one of the engines broke down.
"No problem," the engineer thought, and carried on at half-power.
Further on down the line, the other engine broke down,
and the train came to a standstill.
The engineer decided he should inform the passengers
about why the train had stopped,and made the following announcement:
"Ladies and gentlemen, I have some good news and some bad news.
The badnews is that both engines have failed,
and we will be stuck here for some time.
The good news is that this is a train and not a plane."
Telegram Mistake
A wife with near maturing pregnancy goes to railway station to return to her husband.
At the reservation counter, while her turn came,it was the last ticket.
Taking pity on a very old lady next to her in the queue,
she offered her berth to the old lady and sent a telegram to her husband which reached as
"Shall be coming tomorrow, heavy rush in the train, gave birth to an old lady."
One kiss per Yard
Walking up to a department store's fabric counter, the pretty girl said,
"I would like to buy this material for a new dress.
How much does it cost?""Only one kiss per yard,"
replied the male clerk with a smirk.
"That's fine," said the girl. "I'll take ten yards.
"With expectation and anticipation written all over his face,
the clerk quickly measured out the cloth, wrapped it up, then teasingly held it out.
The girl snapped up the package, pointed to the old lady standing beside her,
and smiled,"Grandma will pay the bill."
Telegram Mistake
A daughter sends a telegram to her father on her clearing B.Ed exams,
which the father receives as "Father, your daughter has been successful in BED."
A husband, while he is on a business trip to a hill station
sends a telegram to his wife "I wish you were here."
The message received by wife, "I wish you were her."
To much work
For a couple years I've been blaming it on lack of sleep
and too much pressure from my job,
but now I found out the real reason:
I'm tired because I'm overworked.The population of the USA is 237 million.
104 million are retired.That leaves 133 million to do the work.
There are 85 million in school, which leaves 48 million to do the work.
Of this there are 29 million employed by the federal government,
leaving 19 million to do the work.2.8 million are in the Armed Forces,
which leaves 16.2 million to do the work .
Take from the total the 14,800,000 people who work for State and City Governments
and that leaves 1.4 million to do the work.
At any given time there are 188,000 people in hospitals,
leaving 1,212,000 to do the work.Now, there are 1,211,998 people in prisons.
That leaves just two people to do the work. You and me.
And you're sitting at your computer reading jokes.
